Nonetheless, something tells us that most of you will be looking for a different adjective to describe the heavily modified 1999 Hummer H1 we found for sale on eBay.
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As you will soon find out, there's too much to mention about the Black Knight Hummer H2, but we'll just note the Lamborghini-style scissor front and rear doors, the decorative (?) machine guns, axes and swords (yes, all in plural) and more LEDs than a Christmas tree at a KISS concert.
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Watch the amusingly slow street race between the two armed forces in the video that follows after the break.
In fact, it’s not uncommon for some Hummer owners to the take H2's over-the-top attitude in the…literal sense.
There's not much info on how the H2 driver managed to park the heavy-weight SUV on top of a Dacia Logan other than that the incident took place somewhere in Romania, but the CanCan website that posted these pictures says no one was hurt from the incident.
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Though it had a very long lifespan of 103 years, no one really noticed its demise. After all, this was just U.S. Bankruptcy Judge Robert Gerbert signing the death certificate. Giving birth to the “new GM” two years ago was a very painful process – and one that most of those involved would like to forget.
It meant the sacrifice of three of its brands (Pontiac, Hummer and Saturn) and getting rid of another (Saab, which ironically is now in a similar position), closing 13 plants along with 900 dealerships. GM also had to reduce its U.S. workforce from 91,000 to 68,500 employees, which either way, is a far cry from the 525,000 workers it had in the States and another 100,000 outside the country in 1955.
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After the vehicle's chauffeur notified the police, officers on the ground with the help of a police helicopter from above were somehow able to quickly spot the stolen Hummer (as it turns out, a stretch Hummer isn't as inconspicuous as the thief may have thought…) and began pursuit.
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His name is Qu Zhibo and he is from the city of Zhigong in China's Hainan province. For three years, Zhibo worked on a special project to develop the most eco-friendly Hummer you will ever lay eyes upon.
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The results are in, and –drumbeat please- the winner is the Ford Mustang that was found to be the “manliest car on the planet” with a net total of 21% of the vote.
Runners up were the Aston Martin DB7 (15%), Range Rover (13%), Dodge Viper (11%) and Hummer H1 (10%). On the opposite end of the spectrum – the world’s “least manly” cars – were the Volkswagen Beetle (31%), Mazda Miata / MX-5 (20%), Ford Ka (11%), Toyota Prius (9%) and Nissan Cube (8%).
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In the first release, we get a two-minute-long video from episode 1 with Richard Hammond trying out the Marauder, which is a South African-built armored vehicle.
During the test, Hammond compares the Marauder with the Hummer to see which one can withstand a blast from seven pounds of plastic explosives. Hit the break to watch the video.
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We're not sure what kind of issues this middle-age woman from Russia was facing at the time this video was shot, but she sure went berserk and in a very dangerous manner.
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So it’s reasonable that DARPA (Defense Advanced Research Projects Agency) started looking for a suitable, and more up-to-date replacement with the Experimental Crowd-derived Combat Support Vehicle project –or, in civilian-speak, “the first crowd-sourced, military relevant vehicle design”.
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However, “driven” is an understatement, since Hammond made the Marauder flatten cars, smash through walls and defy lion attacks. He also took a bright red one for a drive around Johannesburg, creating quite a fuss.
Now, Ford and GM are desperately trying to hold onto these “brand-less” customers. Accoriding to a report from the Wall Street Journal, in this year alone, 70% Pontiac owners, 71% of Saturn owners and 65% of Mercury owners who traded in their vehicles left with something other than a Ford or GM product.
The metropolitan tank gets a huge dose of Extenze to fit that extra axle (and super-size the interior), a body kit, a new exhaust system and a dozen extra lights on its nose.
Inside is just what people have come to expect from limousines: leather, plush carpeting, big TV screens, and liquor. Just what you need to get the party started.
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After a lengthy visit at their warehouse, CFC's tuning team went ahead and stuffed the Hummer H2 like a Thanksgiving turkey. Starting from the outside, the 'chrome' vinyl wrap is complemented by tinted windows, a carbon wrap for the bonnet and a set of uber-discreet 'CFC' stickers.
There are many rumors to as why China officials would not support the transaction including Beijing's political agendas and environmental concerns (wait, Hummer's aren't efficient and green?), but fact is, the proposed deal is dead.
In keeping with the downsizing theme of the industry, the Romanian designer's proposal is an extremely compact off-roader called the HB that features almost no front and rear overhangs, a high road clearance and huge tires.
The designer says that the Hummer HB adopts a body-on-frame construction with power being provided by a biofuel capable V6 engine.
There are two versions of the HB, one with a smaller windscreen split into three sections and an array of cameras that relay video to the driver through screens, and another with a conventional windscreen and additional lights on the roof, designed for the more serious off-roader.
Designer: Andrus Ciprian , Via: Diseno-art
General Motors officially announced today that it has entered into a definitive agreement to sell its Hummer unit to China's Sichuan Tengzhong Heavy Industrial Machinery Co., Ltd. The sale comes only four months after GM announced that it entered talks with the Chinese heavy equipment maker. Sichuan Tengzhong will purchase Hummer through an investment entity, in which it will hold an 80 per cent stake, while Hong Kong investor Suolang Duoji, a private entrepreneur, will get the remaining 20 per cent stake."HUMMER is a strong global niche brand and this agreement signifies another important milestone in writing the next chapter for both GM and HUMMER," said Fritz Henderson, GM President and CEO. "For HUMMER, the combination of its knowledgeable leadership team, vehicle design expertise and the capital financing of Tengzhong portend a successful future."
Although GM did not disclose the financial terms of the agreement media reports claim that the sale price was around $150 million.
GM said that under the terms of the final agreement, the Chinese company will acquire the ownership of the HUMMER brand, trademark and tradenames, as well as specific IP license rights necessary for the manufacture of HUMMER vehicles.
Sichuan Tengzhong will also get manufacturing, key components and business services from GM during a transitional time period, which was not defined by the Detroit automaker. As an example, GM said that its Shreveport assembly plant would continue to contract assemble the H3 and H3T models while AM General's Mishawaka assembly plant will continue to assemble the H2, both until June 2011, with an optional one year extension until June 2012.
"This transaction marks an exciting step for both Tengzhong and HUMMER, as we invest in a business that has significant opportunity in the U.S. and around the globe," said Yang Yi, chief executive officer of Tengzhong. "We are excited about some of the initiatives already underway at HUMMER that we believe our investment will be able to accelerate, particularly related to the creation of the next generation of more fuel-efficient vehicles to meet not only future regulations but also customer expectations."
My eyes, oh my poor eyes... Can't remember for sure if we have seen any custom made vehicle worse than this heavily modified Hummer H1 that's up for grabs on eBay, but it certainly makes the top list. And wait until you see the interior with the ostrich leather dashboard and the number of LCD screens surrounding the driver... 
Aside from claiming that the modded H1 "gets more attention than all other exotics" (wonder why...), the seller mentions that more than $185,000 were invested on the vehicle that is powered by a tuned V8 diesel cranking out 195 horsepower and 430 lb-ft (583Nm) of torque.
Still interested? Our condolences for your lost of taste but if you insist, the eBay 'Buy it Now' price for the Hummer H1 is $89,000.
Link: eBay
